London Calling

Posted: August 6, 2012 in World News and Events

It only comes once every 4 years, is it any wonder we all go a little Olympic mad?

There have been a few things that have made me scratch my head in wonder this time around, so I thought I’d rattle off my current list.

Many have been so disappointed in our results so far, that they are looking to point the finger of blame already. John Coates, in Sundays paper was blaming the usual target for everything, Julia Gillard. What a surprise that was, I had been wondering how long it would take before someone tried to blame her.

I am still waiting for Abbott to find a Carbon Tax link, but I’m sure it will eventuate. Maybe it will arrive by boat…

Apparently it is due to funding that our PM gets the blame. It seems, if only she’d found a few more bucks to dish out, our swimmers would have swam faster, we would have been able to oil the wheels on the cycles, feed the horses, and our runners could have afforded running shoes instead of thongs.

I’m not a total idiot, just a bit, so I do understand the need for some funding, however is this really how we address things, blame government funding? If only someone had thought to challenge the governments funding decision in the High Court or something. Clive, Twiggy, Campbell, anyone…?

Maybe this is just a way of blaming our coaches? Saying we could have paid more for better talent? Whatever it is it doesn’t wash with me. All our athletes had the best of equipment and facilities, sometimes we just have to admit we aren’t the best at everything.

The coverage on Channel 9 has been rather less than brilliant. It seems there was no risk whatsoever of ever seeing enough of any event at once to get addicted to it. This is rather annoying if channel 9 drops it’s guard and shows more than 2 minutes of something at once, allowing you to get all involved in the event.

So bad in fact, has been the coverage, I at first thought that maybe the person in the control room was having some sort of fit, and just pushing buttons wildly. In between 2 incredibly close ad breaks, you would get to see shots of the hockey, the swimming, the basketball, and a bit of equestrian also. Then between each of these seemingly 10 second clips, you get a minute of Stefanovic telling us we are going to change venues now, almost as if without his valuable input we would not have known the difference between a hockey field an a swimming pool.

Did I leave my wallet at the pub? Again?

It seems to me the ad’s for Underbelly “Badness” (surely the lamest title ever for a TV show), last longer than the continuous coverage of most events. That, and the other upcoming show with what seems like the cast of all the other Underbelly’s. You know, the one that seems like it thinks the idea of a “Mr Mom” is a new idea?

For sporting events, you know, like the Olympics, I thought it might be a novel idea to have sports commentators involved also. Stefanovic may be great at giggling like an idiot when pissed on air, but that does not make him a sports commentator. Neither does an AFL background, and hosting a game show an expert make. If we don’t have an Australian expert, let’s get someone else’s feed, it can’t be that hard.

Here is one enlightening piece of expert commentary I heard last night during the womens marathon. When a breakaway group formed and took a bit of a lead, viewers were wisely informed that the competing athletes behind them still had 2 legs, and 2 arms. Well, strap me down and call me Nancy, I would not have known that, I was certain some had 6.

I imagine that picking up the television rights to the Olympics must be a pretty big deal, and boy are 9 making the most of it. Considering the time difference with the UK, and how there are so many events, over the weekend there is the chance to get extra ratings by showing events that were not shown previously, and replays of highlights at an hour when most aren’t in bed. With the Gem digital channel also, they can even show double the coverage. With Gem being a high definition channel also, they can really display the wonders of modern technology.

On Saturday, I plonked myself down on the couch, grabbed the remote, and hit the number 9 button, ready for a bit of Olympic action. Alas, there was a NRL game on instead. “Bummer”, I thought, but I also understand that due to contractual obligations, 9 probably had to show the NRL.

“No problem”, I thought, “I’ll just switch over to Gem and watch the coverage there instead”. But again, only disappointment awaited.

You are probably thinking there was something important on Gem right?. A breaking news story, a movie length version of an ad for Farmer Wants a Wife… Brides diving off diving boards etc Unfortunately not, the programmers at 9, in their wisdom, thought we would rather watch re-runs of Bewitched. How thoughtful.

So they did the same on Sunday too.

Mind you, I always admire the brilliance of the programmers on most of the commercial networks, running repeats of old 70’s shows on the High Definition channels. Way to show off technology fella’s.

What planet are these people on???

Kristina Keneally, the last great Premier of NSW, has also become involved in what was an odd olympic moment.

Kristina, in her new role as head of Basketball Australia, was forced to make one of the toughest decisions she will ever make, despite being fresh on the job. You see, it seems someone whom I will kindly refer to as brain dead, made a bit of a balls up when booking the team flights to the UK.

The Mens basketball team were to fly business class, and the Womens Basketball team were to fly economy. Nice one. Luckily Keneally was going to have none of that, and promptly organised upgrades for the gal’s.

What sort of clown would book economy for an olympic basketball team anyway? Basketballers of either sex are not exactly known for their short legs.

It’s not all bad news though. I was thrilled to see the darling of the pool, Libby Tricket getting her picture in the paper firing a handgun. Libby, and others were pictured blasting away with loaded pistols at a shooting range as part of a 2007 team building exercise. Apparently thanks to budget cutbacks from Julia Gillard, the team building exercise of nuclear weapons testing had to be scrapped this year, due to costs.

Our gun toting golden gal of the pool

Still, I think it’s great for swimming to see our competitors blasting away with loaded firearms. It lifts the public perception of the sport, it boosts morale, and it enhances the image of the sport overall. Awesome stuff, and it was a wise decision in 2007 by officials and organisers indeed.

What really lets us all down though, is when a couple of members of the team go and ruin it for everybody this time around. Having their photos taken posing with unloaded guns in a licensed gun shop is just not on.

When will these bad boy swimmers like Nick Darcy ever learn? Swimming should not be associated in any way with death, or weapons of any type at all in fact.

If you don’t believe me, just ask The Thorpedo, or The Missile Magnussen.

If only they could find a better way to express themselves like some of our other swimming greats. Smashing up your apartment in a drunken rage and scaring the crap out of your wife and kids, forcing them to flee in fear for example, that’s cool. That will get you a gig in the official commentary team.

The Olympic coverage green room?

Oddly enough, our Olympic shooting team have stayed silent on the matter. Maybe there are concerns one of them may have been photographed in a pair of togs. If a picture like that were to go up on Facebook, it could bring the sport of shooting into disrepute.

Still, despite the hypocrisy, the dodgy coverage, and the lack of gold medals coming our way, I can’t help but be hooked by the games. They are seriously addictive stuff.

There are, however 2 vital elements missing…

HG and Roy.

Is that really too much to ask?

Comments
  1. Marilyn says:

    HG is on The Project.

    But the coverage has been appalling – who thought it was a good idea to put Ray Warren at the swimming?

    And Bolt sure did show them how to fox didn’t he? What an amazing race.

  2. denni says:

    /Users/deniseallen/Pictures/iPhoto Library/Originals/2012/30:05:2012_5/thumbnail.aspx.jpeg

    …dont let this man near London!

  3. deknarf says:

    GOD! I am soooooooooo bloody sick of the Orympics and the bitching and whining and blaming by the Australian IOC parasites of everyone, including the government, except themselves! Gosh! We didn’t get too many golds, but a lot of silver’s — Oh tragedy, there were others, picking from a larger number of resources, that were better than us! So F***ing what!!!!! Our people put in a great effort — applaud them for that instead of just bitching!!

    • Anne Milligan says:

      I think it should be the whinging Aussies instead of whinging Pomms.
      If it is not how poor they are we didn’t get a lot of gold medals.
      They make me sick.

  4. Min says:

    Deknarf, I would second that…

  5. Celeste says:

    Can you imagine what a field day Roy and HG would have with the male power lifters and gymnasts and divers? They were the dream team in the 2000 Olympics that won over even the hardest of Olympic weary fans with their ebullient and gregarious interpretation of even the most boring events. In stark comparison TV Week popularly voted twit Karl and his innane drivel shows he and Leila have very limited grasp on the actual content ..and condascending to all other sports we want to watch other then swimming. The media “talent pool” pardon the pun , must have been really drained to get self-promoting , lame gold logie totin Karl.

    NB .Anyone been able to get a VPN to get live feeds through BBC or Youtube? might be better to cut out all the unecessary ads?

  6. kazann says:

    The coverage has been pathetic and tell me when did poolside interviews become so negative. Is it to much to ask for the interviewer to say congratulations to a silver medal winner and then ask how he feels rather than the first thing out of the interviewers mouth being “you must be disappointed’. How rude.

  7. sue says:

    I must admit I wait eagerly to see which of the “can’t” advertisements will be shown by 9. They really are the big surprise of the games, I only hope the AOC gets a bonus.

  8. sue says:

    I did see John Coates thinks it is the Governments reponsibility that sport be in the school curriculum. Coates no doubts has praise for John Howard, who had such foresight to have flag poles as his main prioity for school funding. Those athletes who do make it to the winners podium, thanks to Howard recognise the Aussie flag

  9. Ken Atkinson says:

    Have to agree with the majority of sentiments expressed here, the coverage has been disappointing but I expected no less. What really grinds my gears are some of the mindnumbing advertising breaks, especially the Coles down down prices are down ads. Whenever I go to a Coles Supermarket [as rarely as possible nowadays] I am more likely to see the abominable snowman than any shoppers with a smile on their face, not to mention dancing in the aisles. And another thing, why the need to tell us all that Coles will donate to school sports programs for the future? Why not do it anyway without the need to promote the fact? If I am to show goodwill and beneficence in any way, the last thing I should do is go around and blow my trumpet so everyone knows what a fine human being I am.. just do it because it’s the right thing to do, not because a payback is expected.

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